CSA award in Father’s favour
It’s been a while since I posted, time has been diluted and I have avoided facing my stepfamily issues in hope they will subside but bombshells still go off unexpectedly here and there. Some bigger than others! So much has happened since my last post but first I want to update my post about the CSA.
The Issue: The CSA, after a tribunal the Judge decided to tell my DH’s ex that he had in fact been overpaying, told the CSA that they were useless and awarded the judgement in my DH’s favour. They gave him all his overpayment money back and his ex has to repay it to them. Hoorah! Justice does in fact exist!!
Result: Ex/BM is LIVID!! She has now put in a new assessment request which will make her more livid because it will be returned as nil. This means she will get no money. Why? My DH has tried to get the CSA to disregard his recently awarded War Pension and move straight to the reassessment but they won’t do it. DH explained that his Ex would go nuts if they assessed it as Nil and take it out on his son. They didn’t really seem to think there was a way round it but decided to leave the current payment as it was and wait for her to put in a reassessment request herself, that way, in the meantime, Ex gets money and SS gets a peaceful life. BUT..she’s already put in the reassessment claim after reeling about having to pay back the CSA £1,000. After she gets a Nil assessment she will apply for another assessment and that will sort things out, but the shouting OMG stage from her is unavoidable…and DH tried to prevent it from happening.
Fallout on SS: The CSA want paying back the overpayment they made to DH’s Ex. She is so angry about it all that she is taking it out on their son. She has had tantrums, her husband has told SS that THEY paid for his recent birthday present of a bike because we bought it with THEIR money (honestly, I think he is just as crazy as she is). Her everyday child punishments seem to be becoming more disjointed and absurd with each passing day. We are worried.
The Counsellor’s View: My stepson (aka SS) sees a counsellor because his mother (aka BM or Ex) couldn’t communicate with him and he was having increasing problems with both her, his stepfather (aka SF) and his extended family. This is the second lot of counselling he has had. He has just turned 11. The Counsellor has watched SS go up and down with emotions, feelings, experiences and all in, his verdict is: BM is showing signs of Psychosis and SS should really come and live with us sooner rather than later. Great news for SS, great news for his Grandparents, great and bad news for his Father and crippling news for me. My immediate reaction is NO WAY!! But more on that in another post.
Life just got so confusing it is outrageous. I have to figure out where my loyalties lie, with my husband, my step family or with myself. What do I want? Can I cope? Do I want to? What the HELL do I do next?
Tags: CSA, father, overpayment, wins
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